Friday, May 25, 2007

Does he need me less than I need him?

,When my husband and I have a disagreement, I am worried that there is a common pattern that is emerging. We disagree, have difficulty communicating our disagreement or get fed up by it, and both of us stubbornly retreat - still angry, disagreement unresolved - and there is quiet. We might return to a kind of normalcy but this is just an air, because of course nothing has been resolved. In this case - neither one of us has "gotten our way" and eventually because I can't stand the pretense of normalcy will probably apologize and tell him that I made a mistake, or overreacted.. And in the case that it is something that I really feel especially strongly about - I might just ignore it all together and eventually things to get back to normal. I guess you can say that I can't "stay mad." But what if this think is really important to me? What if I don't want to be the one to back down? Why am I always the one who concedes? And it got me thinking - does he need me less than I need him? Is that why I make nice? This doesn't seem fair or right, and it is overall a depressing thought, not something you want to think about in a partnership. Anyway - these are some questions that are on my mind - for reasons that are probably obvious, but the details of which I cannot indulge.

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